How to have money conversations with your partner
Updated: Apr 1
Simplified and helpful strategies for discussing finances with your significant other to achieve mutual goals and financial independence.
Let’s face it – money conversations aren’t the easiest ones to have! Talking about finances can be challenging, even within relationships. However, we’re determined to prove that it doesn’t have to be.
Financial intimacy is the act of sharing private information with another. Though, it’s important to have these conversations to maintain sustainable and healthy long-term relationships.
According to a Business Insider article, financial planners suggest being upfront about your finances early in a relationship. This ensures transparency and mutual ground to build a life together with similar financial management skills to attain goals.
Importance of money conversations
Developing financial intimacy may strengthen your relationship with your significant other. It can help you to learn about what each other’s goals are and establish goals together. These conversations should be had before moving in together. Here are some reasons why it’s important to have conversations around money, especially earlier in a relationship.
Holding each other accountable
When you establish financial goals, as a couple, you can start to hold each other accountable. This can result in better financial management. This sense of accountability can result in significant savings and achieving your goals sooner.
Moving in together
When you move in with your partner you should have regular conversations about finances. This makes each party aware of their responsibility when it comes to paying off the home loan or contributing to rental payments. Which leads to the next point…
Splitting expenses and sharing debts
If you’re sharing debts, such as a home loan, you need to be open and transparent about meeting your financial obligations. Additionally, if you’re sharing money or splitting it to meet household expenses, each person needs to be aware of their contribution.
Planning financial independence
If you intend on spending the rest of your life with your significant other, the discussion around financial management is imperative for planning for financial independence. You need to establish common ground around how you wish to achieve freedom, whether it be through investments such as real estate investments or other matters.
Bringing up a money conversation with your partner
It’s important to bring up money conversations with your partner in a judgement free and indirect way. Just like any important matter you discuss with your partner; you want to ensure you both feel safe and free to express any concerns that either of you may have.
Here are some tips for bringing up conversations about money with your significant other:
Take baby steps – start by mentioning your credit score and building up to bigger conversations around planning for financial independence
Relate something you may have read or seen on tv together to something you may be experiencing
Frame “what if” questions or scenarios with your partner
When having conversations about money…
There are numerous factors to consider when you’re already in these conversations about money with your partner. As mentioned, you want to ensure you’re able to let them express themselves comfortably.
Avoid interrupting them
To avoid potential arguments, avoid interrupting your partner when they’re talking. It’s best to work through your finances as a team.
Don’t start conversations with accusations and pinpointing behaviours. This is not constructive.
Be mindful of emotions
Emotions are natural. It’s important to keep your partners emotions in mind and try to diffuse emotions through clear and logical discussions.
Ask them about their upbringing
This can help you to understand their views around money and the ways their attitudes were formed.
Financial information should be shared truthfully. You may even find that when you become truthful, your partner may feel comfortable and share their own truth as well. This can help you to work through any matters that may arise from the conversation, together.
For more information
Check out this Valentines Exclusive video where we explore how to navigate money conversations in greater detail.